Moral Compass

I’m not a judge nor a member of the judicial system, however, I try to use my moral compass to navigate through life. I’m not surprised by the verdict on the Mike Brown case. But as a mom I don’t know how to explain to my nine-year old son that the world see’s him differently than I do. I see a pure child, a prophet, a pastor a young man of GOD and the world only see’s him as a potential hoodlum and or thug. I have to explain to him that his life is not valued the same as his white male counterparts. I pray for peace in  my city. I was born and raised in  the city of Saint Louis and I currently live near Ferguson, MO. As a women of God, I don’t feel that rioting will replace the lost of the Brown’s  family or others who have lost family from unforeseen police brutality.However, as a believer  in Yahweh, I have prayed for peace over my city and understanding for those who can’t understand the pain that I feel as a member of not only the black race but also a member of  the Saint Louis community. I grew up in an environment where I saw young men constantly under attacked for just being black. Whether you agree with the verdict or not. MURDER is not the answer for every unforeseen action. May GOD Almighty continue to bless this wonderful nation. I declare and decree peace in this nation, in Jesus name amen.

Until next time…

Blended Families part II

As I stated previously, blended families are the new norm. When you really think about it every relationship we have is blended in some way. Our closes relationships are with people who we share similar ideas about business, parenting, faith etc.  We learn from one another we blend our ides to in order to build relationships. There are some people  who you don’t connect with because you’re not able to  blend your ideas with theirs. When two people come together and become one they share not only a last name but they’re blending their beliefs about faith, family, politics etc. Couples within the same race  have to blend these same ideas and just because you share a race with someone doesn’t automatically guarantee you will rest  on shared idea.  From my perspective a person’s beliefs & culture are common reasons for couples to call it quits, regardless of their race.   You can have people from two different races who maybe weren’t raised culturally the same but because the share the same beliefs about family, faith etc the chances of them having a successful marriage in highly likely.  I guess when you think about it we put too much emphasis on culture and race and not enough on one’s belief system.

As a saved single parent I am more concerned about a person’s beliefs and relationship with God. My life is built around my relationship with Jesus Christ and I am only interested in  dating one who beliefs are the same as mine. I can negotiate geographical preferences, however, I can’t compromise my belief system. It can be challenging at times to blend families that have children from previous relationships. You have to consider not only the beliefs of you and your potential partner, you have to also consider the beliefs of the bio parents. That can be tough when you chose to run your household in a certain manner that is contrary to the beliefs of the bio parent. All parties have to be committed first to what is best for the child and hopefully from there you can build a solid foundation that  will work out for the best.  In some circumstances you  may have to make the decision to walk away.

Until next time…

Blended Families part I

The highlight of my weekend was sleeping in and rushing out of the house with my son to meet with my friend and her two boys to attend a birthday party.  Our mutual friend was having a birthday party for her biracial fraternal twin boys who turned one! Their mother is African-American and father is white. The mother has a daughter from a previous relationship who is also African-American. We arrived late and little anxious but after being greeted by two 4 ft Elmo balloons we couldn’t help but feel at ease and welcomed. Both families were in attendance, they were all very nice and there wasn’t any friction or confusion. We were all there to celebrate the twins and believe me everything was all about them.  There were two of everything, two 3 tier cakes, with candles that  shot out a few sparks, opened up, spun around and played music. The food was catered and again it was a really friendly pleasant environment. I couldn’t help but keep my eyes  focused on the parents. They made such a cute couple and seem really happy! The dad is so in love with his boys! The parents were working together to keep the boys still so we could take pictures of them. While I was snapping pictures with my phone I couldn’t help but think that blended families are the new normal. Traditionally you see African-American men dating outside of their race and usually African-American women, we hang on faithful and true to them. I think we need to be open to the possibility of finding love outside of our race. My perspective on how a family should live is biblically based however, my perspective on how a family should look has changed.

Blended Families pt. 2 will follow…

Until next time…

It’s Time To Shake Things Up In My Life…

I’ve been really working hard at exploring my life and not living in fear. I’ve decided that I’m going get back to doing things I enjoy and  I will try to be open to expanding my circle and really try to find comfort in being a little uncomfortable. However, some days it is hard to be to adventurous when you’re doing your routine errands. There have been times that I wanted to have a tantrum. Really, I literal wanted to scream, cry and shout while I stood in the grocery store line. I get it. I get why toddlers would rather break down into tears and fall to the floor. But as adults we can’t, we have to keep it moving! No one has time to really have a tantrum in fact most days we’re really too busy to take good care of ourselves. We like to imagine how better our lives would be if we really did have the time to prepare healthier meals, exercise regularly or more often and have an active social life. I don’t even remember how a social life looks.  I usually end my day being self-indulgent  in front of my computer, tv or mobile device. But, I am committed to becoming a better me!  I think I need to find away to schedule ME in my schedule…

Until next time…

Remorse Anyone?

My nine-year old son and I were talking in the car last evening about the word “recall.”  He heard the word being used to describe cars that were being recalled. I asked him to define the word “recall” he explained as best he could and he did a good job. Being a mother I over explained what  “recall”  means in order to be sure he understood in hopes that he will use it properly in the future. In my explanation I used the word “retract” and provided an example.  This morning I woke up feeling remorseful about something that I engaged in later that evening.  This morning I found myself lying in bed replaying my evening beginning with the conversation I had with my son and wishing that I could take back everything that happened later in the night.  I began to remember that I have exposed my eyes and ears to a lot of the things that haven’t always been good for me. There has been times I wanted to retract something hurtful I have said to someone. Unfortunately, we are sometimes too prideful to do so other times we just don’t how much we have affected the other person.  I think that it is good to feel remorse because you change they way you live your life. I don’t believe in living in the past. But ,you can learn from the past and you can use it as fuel to power you through to the next phase of your life. Who can really go through life without remorse of any kind?